Erectile dysfunction is a common issue and can be caused by a number of reasons such as anxiety, age, medication, and physiological issues. The good thing is, ED is treatable!
Anxiety is perhaps the number one reason for ED. Oftentimes the pressure of performing can become overwhelming and cause a disconnect because they are unable to relax. With unrealistic expectations that come from porn and society, men can be harsh on themselves and worry that they aren’t a good lover. Men are hindered from being in the present moment because they are concerned about their performance and focused on the “end goal” being ejaculation.
But what is the goal of sex and intimacy? Is it orgasm or deep connection? The goal is to focus on the love and the connection, not the finish line. Focusing on the connection without expectations can be an excellent anecdote for anxiety. If the goal is connection, there is a beautiful opportunity to use vulnerability to come alongside parts of each other that almost never get connection. When struggling with ED, men need reassurance from their partner and know that they will be loved and wanted regardless of the outcome. Learn to let your partner in during these moments and face those fears together, not alone. There is strength in sharing fears and overcoming them together.
Sex is one of the greatest adventures in a relationship. It makes us feel alive. It can connect our bodies, brains and hearts. In fact, sexual and emotional intimacy are intertwined; we need both to be happy. With too little eroticism – our relationship is dull and with too little emotional connection – sex is mechanical. Most of us don’t know how to find this balance. And talking about our sexual needs is so risky. We might cause a conflict; we might be judged; we might not even know what our needs are. Join us, as two expert therapists have a frank, fun and informative conversation to help you keep it hot! – Sex Therapist, Dr. Laurie Watson, PhD, LMFT
The best four letter word for intimacy is not fuck but talk. Swinging from the highs of passion to the lows of rejection, sex offers us plenty to engage with and talk about. It can trigger what is best and worst in our relationships. Yet most of us find it difficult to discuss – especially outside the bedroom. I want to take away the stigma of talking about sex and instead celebrate its glorious design to enrich our lives. To truly capture the opportunity for growth in intimacy – let’s talk about sex, baby! – Couples Therapist, George Faller, LMFT
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